Free Fridays: Be strong.

A little more to the right… I thought as I adjusted the table nicely. There, that looks good, I said to myself, looking at the plastic table and chair I just put in the middle of the kitchen. Well, a little in the way of everything, but it’s ok. It’s necessary. I’ve been so tired trying to separate the fasting kids from the non-fasting kids in this household. Daniel and Mariam fast like adults, Alhamdulillah. Sarah is seven, so we just encourage her to do full days. She has this fasting calendar where she keeps track of her Full Days and Half Days, and we promised to get her a present after Ramadhan. Idris is four, so he doesn’t fast at all. Well he says “I continue my fast now,” after he’s done with a meal. #salahconcept The problem is Sarah gets so tempted when Idris eats in front of her. “Moooommmmm! Idris is eating in front of me,” she complains. “Idris, I told you so many times don’t eat in front of people who are fasting. It’s not nice,” I scold Idris. But other times, I get annoyed with Sarah when she’s complaining too much. “Sarah, you cannot expect the entire world to stop eating in front of you just because you’re fasting,” I’d tell her. I usually get more unreasonable whining in return. So finally, I set up a little area for Idris to eat in the kitchen so no one sees. He’ll sit there quietly, chomping down a bowl of rice and going “Mmmm yummy!” to which Sarah will reply from the living room “I can hear you, Idris!” 😬 First few days, he will obediently go to the back to eat or drink. But after a while, he got bored of it. And he started going to the front because he’s fomo - he wants to be with everyone else. But with a biscuit in his hand. Ahhh an innocent biscuit. The enemy for Sarah. A trigger point. “Mom, he’s doing it again,” Sarah points it out at me. What I want to say: Can the both of you please grow up and not complain about these things. I’m also fasting ok. What I say instead, “Sarah, we cannot lock people up in the kitchen. Try not to look at him. Just focus on yourself.” “I can’t. The biscuit looks so good. Can I do half day today?” Ishhhhh. Biskut ni punnnnn. “No, Sarah, you can’t just give up because someone else is eating. You’re stronger than this. Be strong,” I remind her how many Full Days she’s done this month, and how impressive it is. I know she can do it! “But moooooommmmmmmmmmmm….” she starts whining with the longest Mom in the world. Then this Idris, sighhh. He goes up to her and says right to her face, “Yeah, Sarah,” with a biscuit in his hand, he continues, “Be. Strong.” And then, in front of her face, he bites the biscuit. In slow motion. Both ended up crying and screaming at each other. ARGHHH THESE TWO. Ramadhan really does teach us patience. From eating, from gossiping, from looking at haram - and also from pulling your children’s ears even when they absolutely deserve it. Moms with many children at home – tips pleaseeee. How do I separate these two?! Let me know you’ve read this. Comment “stop it, biscuit” on my latest post at @sincerelyvivy. See you there! :)