Fucking Season, Part Three: Fisting as a Practice of Presence

You might not think yoga and fisting go together. Walk with me for a second. For me, sex- especially queer sex- has always been part of my yoga practice. Not because it’s acrobatic or impressive, but because it’s about learning how to be in the body without rushing, overriding, or dissociating. This post is not about pushing anyone toward something they don’t want. It’s about demystifying something that already exists- and doing it without shame, panic, or secrecy. Because feeling “bad at sex” is exhausting. And unnecessary. I made this video because I couldn’t find anything that talked about fisting casually- as something people might be curious about, want to learn slowly, or want to understand without being thrown into extremes. I am not an expert. I am not here to prescribe. I’m here to share what I’ve learned through experience, curiosity, and listening-especially as a queer person whose body and relationships didn’t come with a ready-made script. And I want to say this clearly: Sex should be fun, not stressful. This is a reference—not a directive. Rather than repeating the video beat-for-beat, I want to pull out the philosophy underneath it, because that’s the real offering. What most people imagine is not how it actually begins. This practice is about gradual opening, responsiveness, and patience- not force or performance. The body leads. The hand follows. Begin slowly because today’s body is today’s body. And then listen for rhythm- breath, sound, movement. Speed isn’t the enemy. Disconnection is. Support your body. Support your partner’s body. Pillows, positions, breaks, water- none of these are optional luxuries. When people aren’t comfortable, they perform. When people are comfortable, they tell the truth. Stretching, hand care, gloves, lubrication—these aren’t technicalities. They’re forms of respect. They allow presence to last longer. Music helps. Rhythm helps. Touch evolves. Nothing about this is linear. Sex isn’t a problem to solve. It’s a conversation unfolding. Some forms of pleasure are physically demanding. That’s not a flaw- it’s information. Strength, stretching, and pacing allow you to stay present instead of counting the seconds until it’s over. The goal isn’t endurance for its own sake- it’s longevity with joy. This isn’t really about fisting. It’s about approaching intimacy without fear. Without rushing. Without turning sex into a test you’re trying to pass. Sex is play. Sex is learning. Sex is allowed to be awkward, funny, slow, and sacred- all at once. That’s what makes it part of my practice.